The last vacation that I had this year would be my trip to Scotland, London and Paris early June.

That, was a blast!

And tonite, I'll be going to Lumut, Damai Laut to be exact with my other half. We have reserved an apartment there, of coz so we're not sharing a room hihi..

I havent call my mom and tell her yet as this is a last minute plan. I'll call her on my way back soon.

Then maybe saturday we're off to Pangkor island. I like pangkor, and that maybe because I never been to Perhentian yet, which ok ok I know I know shame on me right? I'm planning to go there early next year with some friends...yes yes I'm hoping that I can go. I am almost 90% sure that soon I have to declare bankcruptcy due to my expenses for UK trip. The flight tix, train and hotels nearly cost me 5k and I'm still paying for that every month :(

yaahhh..I know...i'm not supposed to use credit card for all that. But I was saving cash for some shopping and I was nearly convince that I can pay it on time.

But, but.. somehow I cannot pay it on lump sum as I found myself on the brink of bankcruptcy every month heehee...yep, I know I have to hang myself under pokok taugeh...

hiks! tsk tsk...banyak hutang jiwa tak senang ooo...

oo well...this trip will be a short one. so i hope it doesnt really burst my pocket which, unfortunately dah kering even though it only the first week of the month and salary is sooo much long way to go..

*sigh....

maybe I should do something about it...like...cancelling my gym membership as I do not go there religiously as I should. the excuses? no excuses...just that I come home late, not worth of me running there, and if I go home early, I was lazy or maybe because I have a very busy social life...HAHA

ok i'd better go now. somebody keeps on texting me asking where the hell i am coz i promise that i'll be going hom soon and that soon was 15 minutes ago.

oh there's another text again...
i really have to go.

happy weekend!

Sedar sedar dah setahun 3 bulan aku dekat company ni..
macam-macam yang dah aku pelajari..
dari system yang complicated sampai la perangai manusia
dengan bos-bosnya yang macam-macam perangai, dengan senior yang begitu,
dengan staf yang begini,
dari kawan jadi lawan jer takde lagi..*touch wood*
moga-moga takde la yang begitu..

ada yang suka saja dipuji, ada yang suka memuji
ada yang suka main-main, ada yang serius sangat sampai tak sempat senyum
pelbagai ragam manusia
yang baik, yang busuk hati, yang sopan santun, yang kurang ajar pon ada agaknya,
mungkin nasib aku baik..belom terkena
tapi kata orang, sebelom terkena, baik kiter waspada dulu
kan?

sukar....tapi benda baru memang la sukar,
nah sekarang, tanpa disangka, aku dah boleh jadi team leader,
dah boleh manage project sendiri
dah pandai nak main tarik tali ngan client
tiap-tiap hari pegang kalkulator
kira sana kira sini...yang kaya kompeni, bukan aku..
tiap-tiap bulan issue invoice, yang dapat duit pon kompeni, bukan aku...
aku masih la begini...dan di sini.

setakat ni, syukor pada Tuhan
masih bersemangat datang kerja
itu penting kan sebenarnya?
tempat lamer dulu, di akhir-akhir waktu, malas nyer datang kerja
kerja pon macam tak nampak tujuan dan matlamat
kenape ek? mungkin faktor sekeliling..
mungkin sebab bos nya begitu...

kali pertama jejak kaki ke sini...waaahhh sangat kagum..
kenapa? sebab opis cantik sekali, besar sangat
dan nampak macam orang-orang yang kerja kat sini, sangat
sophisticated, sangat profesional
zahirnya? begitu...
hakikatnya, Alhamdulillah pon begitu
jadi di mana silapnya? Management ker?
hmm....
kiter tunggu dan lihat sajalah...

Cepat kan masa berlalu?

Pejam celik pejam celik, 17 November, genaplah 2 tahun pemergian ayahanda tercinta..
betapa macam baru semalam kan dengar suaranya
betapa sunyi hidup mak sekarang
rinduuuu...
kalaulah mimpi-mimpiku sentiasa ada ayah..
mesti hilang rindu kan?

takut...
kalau-kalau makin lama, makin hilang ingatan aku pada arwah
risau..makin lama makin terhakis raut wajah ayah dalam memoriku..
sedih..bila mengenangkan kita tak mungkin bertemu kembali
hingga ke alam sana..
dapat ker?
jika dibandingkan...siapa la aku...
ilmu? cetek...dan malas sungguh menambah ilmu akhirat
asyik mengejar dunia..
mana nak bercuti bulan depan tahun depan? mana nak pergi malam esok?
handbag itu cantik...waaa kasut tu lawa...
hutang keliling piggang...ptptn lagi...credit card lagi..
insuran lagi..kereta...rumah...bil..bil..bil...
jadik? layakkah aku bertemu ayah nanti?

iman tak dapat diwarisi
ya tepat sekali...jika dibandingkan sifat ayah dan aku...
sungguh memalukan.!

rinduuuuuuuu.......

......................

I'm thinking of opening another blog but i really do not want to leave this diary, which i had since a few years back.
there's too much memories...

~ all those rocketing high tensions and stress i had dealing with my studies, and of coz that includes financial problem i had during those
years in education.

~ all the fights that i had with my beloved ones, including some of my close friends...over the years, some of the them drifted away from me, while at the same time, i somehow managed to find back all my friends, my dear friends who i love and love me back, NO STRING ATTACH!

~ all those pain and sadness i had to go through during the last days of my arwah ayah.

~ all those sacrifies i have done, for me to be able to lead a normal life, after all those hardship and despair

~ but then, my entire life is not all SADNESS and DESPAIR, as this diary is also where i stashed away all my secrets, things that i dont want other people around me to know.

~ also, all happiness in me...the rainbows and sunshines...

~ my success, not yet maybe but my way to success in pattern and plan here..

so, may be i'll keep this one. i dont know...

i'm supposed to be going back home now but on impulse, i browse my dear friend's blog and voila! kene tag haha...

since its friday, everybody else gone, i'm all alone so ok lah. plus, i leave all the works for next week.

but then, let's talked about yours truly very success open house first!

it was held last saturday, i mean, last 2 weeks ago, sponsored by US. we shared all expenses, i cooked, shaira clean *like...really really clean the house, it was in the cleanest condition ever since i moved there*, and pesa helps, even though she slept all the time i was busying myself in the kitchen the nite before.

anyway, the menu was quite extensive compared to all open houses i went this year and last year. we prepared, or maybe I prepared nasi dagang, with brown-coloured rice imported specially from Besut, with gulai ikan tongkol, some fried meehoon (resepi wajib), bolognaise pasta for kids, nasi kerabu with ulam-ulaman, ikan celup tepung and some herb fried chicken *yang ni paling cepat habis, by 3pm all gone...leaving some yang hangit2 berkerak..*. we also had lots of biskut raya, a few types of kek lapis sarawak, my housemate's kek batik and of coz, nasi impit and sate.

for me, it was quite impressive affair, we're singles, rumah bujang, less furniture so everybody has to sit on the floor, with only meja jepun barely hold all the dishes. the winners of coz, shaira's colleague. turned out all of them came, brought their families along, stayed for a long time *which for me, open house is where you just linger around, eat and if the house is too crowded when the next guests come in, you have the courtesy to leave* but nevermind, that only required when your apartment/house is not that big which cannot hold so many people at one time.

but then, all my dearest friends came at night. we ate, played some fools game until 2 am and made lots of noise. we're always like that. it's like the bond we have since more than 10 years in mrsm ago keep getting stronger. and that's why i love them so much. bising giler budak2 ni, dah la siap melompat2 kalah game...hahah risau jer takot kene warning ngn MC. hehe

foods? sate gone! nasi impit gone! most of it was gone except some yang memang aku simpan sebab tak sempat makan.

went they left, we were so damn tired. we just left all the mess and only tend to it the next morning. penat siolllll!!!!! nasib baik pakai pinggan plastik kalo takkk..sape nk basuh pinggan weii..oh, talking about that, i still havent send mon's pot haha. tomorrow maybe!

even though it was a tiring event, i think i'm gonna do it again next year, and next other year..and again and again. i love to see all those friends. i love cooking for them. sedap ke tak?? lantaklahhhh AHAHAHHA

the best part for me? my honey stuck with me from the beginning until the end. basuh pinggan, bakar sate, beli ais, beli ikan, siang ikan, dia larr...
siap my friends cakap i buli dier. mane derr....

and oh, after that, he sent me flowers to the office, some chocs and a cute teddy bear. surprise..surprise..romantik jugak mamat ni...ingat tadek perasaan hehe.

ok la..nak balik lar..penat!
i'll do the tag later darling...

p/s: nak ke sogo nk beli barang buat sushi hhihih..